Another indication that you should avoid someone is if you are consistently chosen over them.
The list that follows includes blatant indications that someone doesn’t have your best interests at heart, although you should always feel free to set your own boundaries for who you hang out with.
Hopefully, everyone agrees that it’s best to stay away from someone like that.
In my capacity as a life coach, I frequently assist clients in understanding their relationships with others.
That’s why I’m keen to share this list of signs you should stay away from someone.
Signs That You Should Stay Away from Someone
1. They Are Controlling
It’s completely normal to feel uncomfortable if someone is trying to manipulate you so you behave in a way they prefer. They do not have your best interests in mind. They only need you to behave in a way that helps them.
2. They Don’t Respect Boundaries
Ideally, you have established boundaries for how you want other people to behave around you. You should be able to alert people when they transgress these limits. Setting boundaries with this person and having them broken is a blatant sign that they don’t have your best interests at heart.
3. They Always Take and Never Give
Friendship should be a two-way street. You two are not close friends if they refuse to help you in any way. They are merely utilizing you.
Sure, it’s possible they’re going through a rough patch, in which case it might feel wrong for them to give and you to take. But these things should even themselves out over time.
4. They Are Manipulative
Do you ever feel as though this person can talk you into doing something? Do they use emotional outbursts, guilt trips, or other intimidation techniques? While it’s crucial to have the fortitude to spot manipulation and reject it, it’s probably in your best interests to avoid interacting with those who try to control you.
5. They Gaslight You
In a form of manipulation known as gaslighting, one person tries to persuade the other that they are crazy or stupid. They do this to frighten people and persuade them to heed their advice. Although it can also happen to “friends” and family members, it is a common indicator of an abusive relationship. Whenever possible, avoid gaslighters.
6. They Want to Be the Star of the Show
Everyone engages in a game of give and take in all social interactions, which is a general rule.
When you go on a trip with your friends, for instance, the conversation won’t be exclusively about you. The opportunity to talk about themselves and their desires should be given to your friends as well.
Sadly, there are those who don’t regard this. They work hard to refocus the conversation on themselves whenever it veers off to someone else because they want to be the center of attention.
If you find someone who tries to always make the situation about them, step back and give them some space. They’ll demand more than they should while simultaneously refusing to give you the friendship-based attention you deserve.
7. They’re Surrounded by Constant Drama
It’s true that drama can find us all at times. However, it’s obvious that someone has bad intentions if their life is constantly filled with drama. Your best bet is to stay away from someone like this before you get tangled up in their drama.
8. They Share Secrets
In general terms, people like to be “in the know” and you are most likely not exempt. There’s just a certain appeal to knowing the many little secrets others are trying to hide.
And there are people who exploit this desire. They open up about their secrets in an effort to gain favor with others. And it does often succeed, because it makes those people feel trusted.
Of course, you shouldn’t trust them because of things like this.
Chances are good that they are also disclosing your secrets to others if they are really telling you other people’s secrets. You’re not special, no matter what they might tell you.
Even after you have parted ways, it is expected that you will remain close friends and not spill any embarrassing details to the person standing closest to you.
On the other hand, if they’re not actually sharing secrets and are lying to get your attention, then they’re being manipulative and that’s a red flag on its own.
9. You Feel Bad About Yourself When You’re Together
This is one of the clearest signs you should stay away from someone. It’s a signal that the other events on this list are taking place. They may be one of those unfavorable people you should steer clear of, which could explain why. They might be undermining you or manipulating you, for example.
In either case, avoiding toxic individuals who make you feel bad about yourself is advised.
10. You Stoop to Their Toxic Level
It’s critical to accept responsibility for your own inappropriate behavior. But it’s a reality that we often find inspiration in our closest friends and fellow students. Therefore, if you notice that you are acting in a toxic way, it might be wise to consider which toxic individuals are your role models and avoid them.
11. You Don’t Have Fun Around Them
It’s a simple question to ask about your friends; do Around them, I enjoy myself?. If you don’t, that ought to be all you need to know to make the choice to avoid them.
Signs Someone Looks Down On You
It’s not good for your mental health to spend a lot of time with someone who despises you. It can damage your self-esteem and restrict your potential unless you’re incredibly confident and strong-willed.
Some of the telltale signs that you are friends with a toxic person who is attempting to make you feel small are listed below.
12. They Dismiss All Your Ideas
They’re either trying to bring you down on purpose or are a pessimist. It happens more frequently than you might imagine that “friends” limit each other’s development and creativity in order to feel better about their own mediocrity. It is better to spend time with your supporters rather than the doubters if you want to succeed in life.
13. They’re Flaky
A clear indication that someone doesn’t value or respect your time is if they frequently change or cancel plans with you.
14. They Blame You for Their Mistakes
If you allow it, this behavior may have an adverse effect on your mental health. Making the decision to sever ties with those who refuse to admit wrongdoing is preferable.
15. They Don’t Listen to You
Another indication that someone views you as inferior is if they don’t seem to pay attention to you when you’re speaking. Don’t feel bad if you choose to avoid people who are like this.
16. They Don’t Remember What You Tell Them
Another indication that they don’t really think much of you. Clearly what you say doesn’t matter enough to remember. For your own well-being and self-esteem, break off relationships with people like this.
17. They Put Other People Ahead of You
Another indication to stay away from someone is if they consistently choose to focus on someone else over you. Pay attention to how you’re treated in group settings. Are you treated with the respect you deserve, or are you constantly overlooked?
Signs Someone Might Be Dangerous
No matter how ‘cool’ you consider someone to be, your safety should always come first. If danger follows a person around, that’s one of the most important signs you should stay away from someone. The warning signs of a dangerous person were important to me because of this.
18. They Have a History of Dangerous Behavior
It’s true that someone with a history of bad behavior is more likely to still be involved in it; however, it is also true that a dangerous or toxic person has the potential to change their ways.
19. They’re Secretive
Only when they have something bad to hide do people behave secretively. Always keep in mind that your intuition is usually correct if you suspect someone of concealing unsavory information from you.
20. They Won’t Meet in Public
It’s best practice to meet in a public setting first when meeting someone from a dating app or other online platform. This is a customary courtesy to allow you to assess the other person’s safety.
You should treat such a person’s refusal to meet in public as a huge warning sign and think about not meeting them at all.
Last Words
We shouldn’t demand perfection from those we spend time with because people are fallible. That alone would be a warning sign for people to avoid you!
Some people, however, are simply not worth spending time with.
The best course of action when dealing with such people is to back off and consider the future of your friendship.
How much stress can you take? Are they worth the trouble? Each individual’s response will be unique. Give your friendship a chance to develop, but if you’ve noticed at least half of these indicators, it’s time to find new friends.
The population of the entire world is 7 million. Select the options that are healthy for you.
